FC Irlande 2nds

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10 October 2020, a beautiful and sunny Saturday to play football. After 3 losses, FC Irlande 2nds were eager to grab their first 3 points in this season 2020-2020 (no, there is no mistake in those numbers).

The opponent of the day was British United, that the Boys in Green know very well. But first of all, before attacking this beautiful derby, the 2nds had to travel to Bof…Beauch…Bauch…Somewhere in the Brabant wallon, Waals-Brabant, Walloon Brabant, Wallonisch-Brabant, Brabante Valón, Roman Payis, Woals-Broabant, whatever the language you prefer. (the last two languages are Walloon and West-Vlams by the way).

So, the Boys in Green arrived really motivated on the pi… No sorry, I can’t contain myself from making a comment about what’s written above : Roman Payis/Païs, what the hell is that… (more seriously, it’s because the romance language was used in this province in the 12th century. This was the history class of the day).

Anyway, here was the starting eleven : the spicy Josh Harissa in goal (throw me stones for that terrible pun, I deserve it), our half-shiny head Hadrien Valembois at left-back, the “language of Shakespeare” connection in central defense with T-Lion and Selfy, and our favorite spy at right-back (I might “disappear” if  I don’t say that).

In midfield, we had another connection, the “language of Molière” one this time with Brioche, my favorite pastry (let’s just avoid a breakup), and Mathias “Party King” Gineste. On the wings, we had our full-shiny head Gabriel Jacqmin and Benjamin “Suuu” Benjelloun. Captain Dastan was in charge of the offensive midfield position and Ionut Nedelcu was our striker (to be honest, I had to check the family name on SportEasy, sorry Ionut. By the way, is it Yonut or Ionut ?).

We will also note the presence of Lolo’s best friend on British United side.

Some FC Irlande faithful supporters were also present to cheer the team up : big thanks to Pierrone the Python, Rulian Jueda, B2oba, Ale “The Goatfather” Arditi, and a random Flemish girl.

During the first 15 minutes, FC Irlande 2nds showed a determination that they usually lack of at the start of their games. The first dangerous opportunities were unluckily created by British, but luckily they were clumsy in front of the goal. The battle in the midfield was really tough, but FC Irlande proved British United that they could be physically good even if the opponents were taller.

Furthermore, the amount of handballs that were not whistled made everyone forget for a few minutes what sport the 22 actors were playing.

0-0 at half time, no goal scored but an amazing defensive work by the Boys in Green.

In second half, the 2nds went back on the pitch with the same energy. Four substitutions were made during that half : Neil in for Mat G (who came out of the pitch like a injured king), Amadou in for Dastan (good to see the return of the Wakanda King), the flying Dutchman Mike in for Gabriel, and Lolo in for BB7.

Despite the last 20 intense minutes proposed by FC Irlande, the two teams left the pitch without any goal scored. Final score : 0-0. Typically the type of game after which a sport journalist has more interest of talking about everything but what happened during the match.

Positive conclusion : first point of the season for the Boys in Green with a very good attitude.

Negative conclusion : stop f*cking yelling guys.

Purple rain, purple rain… it was one of these rainy days made for the seamen of Irish sheeps, that is at least what we thought when we prepared ourselves for COBRA.

A good covid mood in the locker room and a good attitude of the team offered a fine start into the game.
The first half provided opportunities on both sides of the pitch. FC Ireland 2 was focused and played through the middle,creating some shooting opportunities for Ionut.
Gabi on the left, Lolo on the right, both receiced some good deep balls by our Brioche.
A balanced game changed after 10 min in the second half where cobra, like a nasty snake, scored via a header. FC Ireland did attempt to get closer with some counter- attacks but left a hole in the midfield which has been used again by COBRA.
COBRA did outnumber FC Ireland in the box and scored.
0- 2 for COBRA.

It was an avoidable loss in light of a team which displayed not that much quality. However the team needs to admit that COBRA brought more intensity to the pitch today.
But the seamen will master these turbulent waters and will soon dock at a safe and enjoyable harbour.

Seconds lost 2-0 away from home at Union JP. A mistake early in the first half and a late goal when we pushed everyone forward masked an otherwise spirited performance. Unlucky not to come away with at least one point

Here we go boys, the soccer ball season 2020-21 is finally here! The seasoned seamen of the second team came into the opening weekend full of zest and spunk, ready to leave their mark on the ABSSA Division 2A. Coming off the back of an excellent preseason under the stewardship of skippers Jonny (“Rajon”) Sparks and Dastan there’s a real buzz around the place, as the lads look to build upon the record-breaking points total for an FCI IIs that we achieved last season. It would be a tough away day first-up against old foes FC Schaerbeek but we knew exactly what to expect – a full-blooded grudge match.
Injuries and suspensions ruled some big names out of the matchday squad, including freshly-crowned Player of the Year Amadou-dou-dou (♪ he is better than Giroud ♪) and Brioche who has now returned to his parent team after a successful loan spell with the firsts last season. The Gentleman of Porto and jilted roomie Alex G watched on from the sidelines with plenty of hydration as Schaerbeek baked in the warm Indian (Egytian) Summer conditions. Indeed, the sunlight was deemed too strong for our flying Dutchman Mike to venture safely outdoors, so he’ll be relieved to see the October cloud cover approaching. Flakey Banas was absent and snack machine Gineste was tasked with taking Julian out of town for the weekend to respect the terms of the restraining order filed after the last time these two teams met.
Otherwise, it was a strong and familiar-looking squad that rocked up to the impressive Crossingsstadion (aka “Şükrü-Saracoğlu stadyumu”). We were bolstered by the addition of two newly-signed free agents;’Yorkshire Ederson’Josh Harris and ‘Colombian Keown’ Jhonn Viloria both went straight into the starting XI to make their competitive debuts. A special mention should go to Josh, who demonstrated outstanding commitment to the cause and hemorrhaged countless husband points to be there on the day. Also making his second-team bow and spearheading the attack was our very own Powercube, Ionut – the latest gem to be prised away from the third team. Papa Lion Tom (Naaaaants ingonyama bagithiiiii babaaaaa) filled in alongside a now tee-total Booba in the double pivot, behind captain Dastan operating in his customary position deep in the hole. Pace merchants Gabi and Lolo lined up on the flanks ahead of double-O Clement and football philosophiser Hadri in the full-back positions, with sorry Sergio Ramos wannabe Ryan partnering our debutant sicario Jhonn in central defence. Riding the pine were the out-of-retirement Matthias VDN, ripe-for-retirement Alessandro :-), Man United scum Neil, and His Excellency, (Gay)Lord Benjelloun. Our Presdident Dave was also in attendance to cheer the boys on from the sidelines!
Once our pre-match photo shoot was out of the way and Dastan had bottled the coin toss, the game got underway with the seconds enjoying some nice spells of possession and looking to stamp some early authority on the game. The midfield and defence got a lot of touches on the ball and we started to look dangerous in the final third, with some slick interplay between the Irlande attackers leading to a number of decent half chances. It was not before too long that the breakthrough came, when the industrious Ionut pressured the Schaerbeek goalkeeper into a mistake in his own box and drew a deserved penalty kick. Thankfully for us Booba kept quiet and magnanimously allowed our designated taker Lolo to dispatch the pen expertly in the bottom-right corner, giving Rüştü Reçber no chance. 0-1 Irlande! Schaerbeek offered relatively little in response for the remainder of the half, but their annoyingly decent striker did try to create danger whenever on the ball. Several speculative free kicks, one of which earned Ryan a yellow card, were all the opponents could muster and our new custodian Josh hardly broke a sweat, giving plenty of time to think about how to spend his upcoming birthday. 0-1 up at half time and fairly comfortable.
We’d done OK  but the message for the second half was clear and simple – be more agressive, don’t dive in cheaply, and don’t let them feed their no.9. The disarray that followed was one for the leading chaos theorists to dissect – how an innocent flap of Julian’s wings in the Ardennes could derail our performance in Schaerbeek so seismically was bewildering. We lost all composure, all concentration, all of the right kind of aggression, and immediately gifted the Schaerbeek dangerman (the referee ?) the ball and space to run through on goal and clinically bury an equalizer. Then a second followed… and later a third. A hat-trick for their striker all made far too easy. Reinforcements had arrived in the meantime in Benji, Neilo, VDN and Ale who managed to steady the ship and tried to claw us back into the game. There was no love lost between the two sides and tempers frayed, not helped by the shocking referee awarding free-kicks and offsides against us at every opportunity. Josh pulled out a brilliant back-pedalling save to tip the ball around the post at one stage, probably the only real chance of the game they didn’t actually score from. In the dying seconds, Booba burst into the box and won a penalty which he insisted on taking himself, but unlike John-Simon in his alone time, Booba did not cover himself in glory. The dodgy goalie saved the pen and Hadri could only steer the rebound wide. Leave it to the professionals, Booba! Final score a really disappointing 3-1.
It was tricky to pick out an MVP after the poor team performance and it was only after a thorough delineation of Fermat’s last theorem that the MotM was finally determined and awarded to cult hero Ryan Self. Recommissioned by Gabi due to popular demand, Dick of the Match was a landslide victory for Booba for his end-game antics. We have to learn from this one quickly with another tough game coming next week. Key lessons to take away from the day are to bloody sort out the entropic second-half performances, be very careful wandering the streets of Jutland (J’accuse !!!!) at night and never, EVER, borrow a T-shirt from Benji.

Game postponed

Game postponed

All fixtures and results

#1 September 5, 2020 FC Irlande 2nds - Report Copains Réunis 1
#2 September 12, 2020 FC Irlande 2nds - Report Chenois SC 1
#3 September 19, 2020 Union Schaerbeek 3 - 1 Report FC Irlande 2nds
#4 September 26, 2020 Union JP 1 2 - 0 Report FC Irlande 2nds
#5 October 3, 2020 FC Irlande 2nds 0 - 2 Report Cobra Team
#6 October 10, 2020 British United 1 0 - 0 Report FC Irlande 2nds
#7 October 17, 2020 FC Irlande 2nds - New Arquois FC 1
#8 October 24, 2020 Lorraine RFC 2 - FC Irlande 2nds
#9 October 31, 2020 FC Irlande 2nds - Goalois 1
#10 November 7, 2020 FC Irlande 2nds - Mtm FC
#11 November 14, 2020 Enghien Amical - FC Irlande 2nds
#12 November 21, 2020 FC Irlande 2nds - FC Vollenback
#13 November 28, 2020 Goalois 1 - FC Irlande 2nds
#14 December 5, 2020 Chenois SC 1 - FC Irlande 2nds
#15 December 12, 2020 Tourinnois FC 2 - FC Irlande 2nds
#16 January 9, 2021 FC Irlande 2nds - Union Schaerbeek
#17 January 16, 2021 FC Irlande 2nds - Union JP 1
#18 January 23, 2021 Cobra Team - FC Irlande 2nds
#19 January 30, 2021 FC Irlande 2nds - British United 1
#20 February 6, 2021 New Arquois FC 1 - FC Irlande 2nds
#21 February 13, 2021 FC Irlande 2nds - Tourinnois FC 2
#22 February 20, 2021 Copains Réunis 1 - FC Irlande 2nds
#23 February 27, 2021 FC Irlande 2nds - Lorraine RFC 2
#24 March 6, 2021 Mtm FC - FC Irlande 2nds
#25 March 13, 2021 FC Irlande 2nds - Enghien Amical
#26 March 20, 2021 FC Vollenback - FC Irlande 2nds

FC Irlande 2nds

  • Coach : John-Simon Sparks
  • Captain : Dastan Salehi

Top goals scorers

  • Lorenz Blanco 1
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